Release of Obligation to Memory

Posted on Sun Sep 14th, 2025 @ 9:05am by Vice Admiral Suzanna Blokpoel

1,929 words; about a 10 minute read

Mission: Second Light
Location: SB 369

// Vice Admiral Blokpoel's Office Suite :: Starbase 369 //

It had been six months since Kate Nichols-Cherbourg had made a decision in her psychotherapy counselling to address her very strained relationship with her father, Richard Nichols. The issues with him dated far back into her childhood, and those issues had been part of her therapy since the beginning, when, 6 years ago, she had found herself in a state of significant depression and was unwilling to just take medication to relieve the symptoms of conflicting lethargy and anxiety. She had approached her new commanding officer, Rear Admiral (at that time) Suzanna Blokpoel about the depression and rather than shame her or reject her as her fairly new yeoman, Blokpoel had gently but firmly suggested therapy.

Over the next 5 and a half years, Kate had seen her therapist, LtCmdr Debi Tenebrae, a minimum of once a week, sometimes more when she felt particularly triggered by either the sessions themselves, or outside circumstances. Kate had learned to love therapy. Not only did it make her feel empowered to manage her own life's challenges, but she actually liked the honest woman she was revealing as herself; a woman with solid boundaries against the those who chose to try to intrude upon her values and her sovereignty, and a sense of conviction about running her own life, on her own ethical terms, rather than cowing to everyone else's competing demands upon her loyalties. It was the most freeing experience of her life, and perhaps the thing she was most proud of having achieved in her life, as well.

This week's session with Tenebrae had resulted in yet another step toward claiming her own sovereignty. She intended to take that decision to Admiral Blokpoel this morning, to discuss the idea.

So, as usual, she sat at her desk with a cup of tea for herself and a tray beside her for the Vice Admiral when she arrived. On the tray, perched on a warming plate, was an elegant matte black ceramic teapot with an extra long spout gracefully curving upward. Beside the pot of hot water was an extra large matte black ceramic mug, with the stylized image of an elegant cat etched into both "sides" of the mug, the tail of which echoed the curve of the spout of the teapot. Atop the mug, a matching black lid would keep the contents from cooling too quickly. On a small black plate was a teabag of the Admiral's favorite blend and an orange-cranberry scone. A little dispenser of sweetener and a small black pitcher of milk completed the ensemble.

Kate went back to sorting the Admiral's schedule for the next week, as she had 14 requests for appointments and 7 evening event invitations.

Suzanna had been on the Erasmus, it was on its 2-week shore leave rotation, and she'd checked in with Commander Sisem Vinid, her XO on the ship. She would take the Erasmus to the Spinward March to repeat the charting they had done in her home dimension. Part of her was jealous of being out on the Erasmus, yet Suzanna was also realistic enough that it was impossible given her position in Starfleet. And she was not ready to retire yet, either. With her Vulcan constitution, she was just getting to her prime.

She glanced at her chrono, as she approached her offices, it was that time of the day. And she knew her yeoman would be prepared for that. The doors swooshed open as she approached them. "Good morning, Lieutenant."

The Admiral always called her Lieutenant. Not Kate, not LT Nichols-Cherbourg, but just Lieutenant. Kate knew that was not a slight to feel snubbed about. It was just her way and Kate was fine with that. Still, it was her name that was on her mind this morning. "I have your tea ready and the day's agenda is on your desktop. Your first appointment is with Captain Ulrich, and then you have a two-hour span before a meeting with Vice Admiral Corcoran from Vega 7 Colony. It was supposed to be in-person, but he is still on Vega 7 Colony, where he's waiting on a repair on his transport vessel to bring him here. You have two options for lunch today. There is a Toastmaster's Club meeting at the Vulcan Cafe at 1200. They have requested your presence to speak on the topic of extemporaneous speaking in public, and General Sh'Tamos from the Andorian Ancestry Council has asked for your presence at their 1st meeting since formation here on the Starbase. The meeting begins at 1215 and their topic is mixed ancestry. If neither of those opportunities appeal to you, there is an opening at a luncheon at Commodore Angleton's table at a lecture by the author of the controversial book "Between Nubula's Range: Early Terran-Vulcan Relationships." Your time is unscheduled for the rest of the afternoon until the dedication ceremonies for the Station's Public Library at 1630, with hor d'oeuvres and cocktails to follow, your evening beyond that is open."

Suzanna nodded as she listened to the listing of her day's option by her yeoman. The thought of tea was appealing, she knew it would be perfect, including the scone. It had become their ritual. She picked up the tray and took it to her office, while she was debating the options given to her for lunch. "Please join me for the tea, Lieutenant, while we go through the calendar options." There was not always time for that, and as long as they talked work she kept it formal, but she could sense there was more on her yeoman's mind. Suzanna put the tray on the coffee table between two couches in the corner of her office, and sat down on one of them. She had been considering the options for lunch and made a decision. "I'll join General Sh'Thamos for lunch today."

"How was your time away, if I may ask Ma'am?" ventured Kate. They had a very good relationship, and she would never have asked any other senior officer about their weekend, but felt comfortable asking Blokpoel, and she wanted to turn the conversation a little more personal in order to bring up what was on her mind.

Suzanna put the teabag in the mug, stirred a moment and replaced the lid to keep the heat in for now, taking the time to consider her reply. “It was agreeable to see my family again, and spend time with my father in his final weeks,” she replied as she took the lid off the mug, put a dash of milk and some sweetner in and stirred, before replacing the lid again, to allow the drink to steep more.

“You were in my thoughts daily, Ma’am. I’m glad you were able to be there for your Father. Such a transition is a challenge for both the one transitioning, and those attending them in the process. It is a privilege I think to share in something like that.” Kate had brought her own mug of tea into the office and took a little sip. “I rather thought you would choose the General’s offer. He’s an interesting man. He was quite talkative on the comm when he connected with me. I was surprised. Asked how my day was, if I’d heard from you, how long I’d worked with you or whether I was new to you on your move to 369. He wasn’t creepy or insulting. Just happy, I guess is the word.”

Suzanna nodded again as Kate talked about her father and the transition, it had been a privilege, even if it had been a difficult time. Given that when she had arrived in this dimension, she had, initially, had to accept that she would never see her family again. It wasn’t until many years later that the wormhole was found that allowed her to visit. In the mean time, she took the lid of the mug and stirred it some more, the tea was still very hot thanks to the having the lid, the tea had the perfect colour now. “It sounded the most interesting proposal, and I have found that the Andorians are an interesting species, if very emotional.” The General had done some basic intelligence gathering via her yeoman, but that was part of both their jobs. “How have you spent the time that I was away, did you have the opportunity to take some leave as well?”

“I did. My artist friend Michael and I travelled to an art colony on Amber V. You met Michael, I think. Tall, handsome and clearly gay and flamboyant. This colony on the largely industrial mining colony is amazing. They are self-sustaining, grow their own food. Use only solar power to run the colony. They have permanent artists in residence and people who come to stay for a limited time, to write a book, or finish a body of paintings. They offered a poetry and art workshop and Michael and I went for 3 weeks of the workshop and then stayed another week to take part in a lecture on hydroponics and another on Andorian literature. I guess I should ask General Sh’Thamos about that. Anyway, it was very relaxing. I came away with three paintings I just love, and I’m not that great of a painter, but I love these. And a whole notebook full of poems, some need revision, but many are finished. But I want to ask your opinion on something, if I may.” Kate paused.

Her expression softened as Suzanna listened to the story about Kate’s leave. “It sounds like it was just what you needed from your leave, Lieutenant. And of course you may ask.” Her yeoman was one of the few people outside of her small circle that she trusted enough to do so. Over the decades she had learned the hard way that there were people that just wanted to be around her to use her, or her name for their own personal gain, or even to do her harm.

“I think I want to drop by father’s name from my name. Drop Nichols. He was a nasty sort and hurt me a lot and my mother. Every time I hear someone call me Yeoman Nichols-Cherbourg, I cringe. I want to change my name, legally, to just Cherbourg. Kate Cherbourg. Yeoman Cherbourg. What do you think? I know changing your name is a big deal. It’s changing your identity.” Again, Kate paused.

Suzanna first raised an eyebrow as her yeoman explained her dilemma, and took a moment to consider. “I am sorry to hear about what happened in your past,” she started and paused again, “I believe you should do what you are most comfortable with, if that is dropping part of your name, then do so. You need to be comfortable and... happy with it. I am not sure if it changes your identity that much if you just drop one part. If you changed it to something completely different, its change may have a bigger effect. You are still you, irrespective of your name.”

“I hadn’t thought of that. It’s just like dropping that negative aspect, the memories I’ve learned from, gained wisdom from, but I don’t have to hold onto forever out of some misplaced sense of obligation. Right?” Kate replied thoughtfully.

“Then it seems like a logical choice to me,” Suzanna replied.

VAdm Suzanna Blokpoel
Fleet Science Officer
Epsilon Fleet
"Everything fits, otherwise we'll make it fit!"

Lt Kate Nichols-Cherbourg
Yeoman to VAdmiral Blokpoel
Starbase 369

 

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